So, I hate squirrels. They are like little furry rats. They are fast, unpredictable, and armed with rabies and sharp claws. They can climb trees and attack from above. On my work campus people feed them, and that makes them unafraid of humans. They don't run when you stomp your feet. They stand there and stare at you, daring you to make a move towards them. They will purposefully run in your path so that you have to stop dead in your tracks, and then try to find a way around them. You go left, they go left. You go right, they go right. They stare at you with their beady little eyes, just daring you to test them. They perch on their hind legs, just waiting to spring into action and bite your face off. They run across the window ledge in my peripheral vision, just to make sure I know they're watching me. I won't walk through the grass once it starts getting dark earlier because I know they're waiting in the shadows to make their silent attack. They chirp and squawk in their little squirrely language telling one another, "Here she comes!! The scared one! Let's go get her!!" and they do. I honestly have no idea how to get around them. They know I'm afraid of them and they love to prance, as slowly as possible--mind you, right past me just to make me stand there, frozen in fear and wait.
I think I'll start bringing Westin to work with me so he can attack them.
Or at least bark at them and be more intimidating than I am!!
1 comment:
im laughing so hard. Silly bring them food, duh! Bird seed or sunflower seeds or something. Then throw it, they go after it, and you can keep on walking.
HAHAHAHAHA
squirrels won't hurt you, its the little green men or spiders lol
Post a Comment